Development trainer, trainer and marketer Killu Kolsar is a woman who never loses a smile, even in stressful situations. But that doesn’t mean that her day is always carefree, certainly not. She is able to take the best of everything and try to turn it into a positive. How does he do this on a daily basis? Maybe you’ll find her routines and challenges for herself helpful too.
Firstly, Killu has found a vocation and an opportunity to do things at work that make her shine. This is how she’s linked to “It’s all about me!”. trainings she organises together with Sandra Vabarna and Sandra Raju, as well as the marketing of Treski summer events organised by Jalmar Vabarna. Kolsar adds that she has managed to combine the two things she looks for in her work – a community of people and sharing positivity. “The goal is to keep the world a slightly better place than it was when I came here,” adds Killu as a positive thought.
What is wellness?
According to Kolsar, this is self-explanatory, because well-being equals being well. “But actually, if you go deeper, I feel that sometimes it is interpreted as this kind of physical well-being, that is, my physical health is fine, I’m not sick, I go to the gym and I exercise. And of course that’s an important foundation as well, but I see that there are two more things,” adds Kolsar.
The second is mental well-being and energy, for example how we take in information and cope with stress in our daily lives. And thirdly, emotional wellbeing – how we feel when we wake up in the morning, fall asleep at night, or how we experience things in general.
Routines and challenges to improve the day
In the interview, Kolsar highlights three aspects that keep her on track every day.
- The morning ritual is the be-all and end-all. “For the last four or five years now, I’ve basically taken time for myself every morning and I have a routine or ritual that I do. If I can’t do it for an hour I do it for thirty minutes, if I can’t do it for thirty minutes I do it for five minutes, but I know there has to be that moment that I take for myself”. It’s all made up of three parts that make up the ideal morning routine – something for the body, something for the mind and something for development.
- Anything for the body can be a facial, yoga, a workout or even just a shower in the morning.
- There are also plenty of opportunities for the mind, according to Kolsar. For example, do a morning challenge every month. “This year, I’ve done something new every month with Sandra Raju. For example, a gratitude challenge where you write down three things you are grateful for in the morning. At the same time, we’ve also done shaking, which is basically just standing in your room and shaking, because it’s super good for relaxing the nervous system and it helps with anxiety in general. I’ve taken it into my everyday life when I feel stressed. For example, before going on stage or in a situation of responsibility,” adds Kolsar.
- For Kolsar, reading books is a way to develop. She recommends, for example, reading educational books in the morning when your head is fresher and fiction in the evening. “However, it could be that you’re listening to a podcast or watching an online course,” adds Kolsar, adding that reading books may not be for everyone.
- Another hobby, passion, routine and trick is books, which help her to recharge in the morning or just to wind down in the evening. For Kolsar, reading is a kind of introspection and a better understanding of herself.
- Whether you’re a dancer or not, this can help. Kolsar uses dancing to get oxygen-rich blood to her brain, which helps her concentrate more easily. Plus, it gives her the emotional charge to be more energetic. How? “Maybe it’s when I’m at home on my breaks from work, I’ll put on some kind of playlist or a particular song that I’m into at the time and just dance. Sometimes it’s slow, sometimes it’s fast-paced – you don’t have to watch it in the mirror or on video, it can be robust and weird, but it gets me going,” says Killu, describing the effect of dance on emotion.
Breathing helps to calm and reflect
Breathing is something we often forget, but it can be a remedy for anxiety as well as tension: “It has the ability to calm our whole nervous system and heart function, helps us get oxygen-rich blood back to the brain and is actually just a super powerful way to calm ourselves.”
Simple breathing exercise for different situations (4×4 aka four, four, four, four)
- Count to four while breathing in
- Count to four while holding your breath
- Count to four while breathing out
- Count to four while holding your breath again
To make it easier, Kolsar shares a tip: “Take your palm and start drawing a square. It often helps to keep it at the right pace. Maybe you draw the square at the same pace as you breathe. With four you draw one side of the square as you inhale, with four you draw the other wall of the square, holding your breath, and so on until the square is complete.”
Change your life one step at a time and ask yourself what that smallest first bold step is.
In her work, Kolsar also sees people thinking about how they can change their whole life in one day, or in other words, how they can become an ideal person tomorrow. “I’m going to give up nicotine and alcohol, I’m going to stop consuming sugar and I’m going to work out six times a week and sleep eight hours a night, do a morning ritual and get rid of my smart phone addiction and then I’ll be this and that and the third. But then I look at him and I can’t believe it. One thing at a time – it’s the small steps really that get us to victory. You can’t change everything overnight.”
If you ever want to start creating new habits, adding something to your life, or removing something from your life, it’s worth asking yourself “why do I want to do this?”. because it will help keep you motivated in the future. “Two years ago I started learning the drums, and it was just something new at first, but then I started thinking, why the drums? And I realised that it made me feel like I’m awesome, I’m doing something exciting and not at all for the sake of others, but I feel like this is the life worth living.”
If you have a goal, or a purpose, or something you want to do in this life, for example to perform at the Eurovision Song Contest one day, ask yourself what is the first step you can take to move closer to that. “If you want to set a goal to go to Eurovision, the first bold step is to figure out if you’re going to be a pianist, a singer, or even a sound engineer, for example, and figure out your next step from there,” Kolsar encourages.
Relationships come and go – don’t feel bad about it
Having supportive relationships around us that make us feel safe and well will prolong our lifespan and contribute to our mental health. This has also influenced Kolsar to take an inventory of relationships.
“I like to say that I look at my circle of acquaintances and think about who are the people in my life right now that I want to have more of and really make me feel like anything is possible and awesome,” Kolsar begins the inventory.
Secondly, it’s worth thinking about how I can be more myself for them and how they can improve me even more.
The third step is the relationships we may have grown out of, where different things are wanted or the world is seen differently. “And that’s okay. We shouldn’t feel bad because relationships end in life,” she says. Kolsar encourages, however, to move on in life and not always hold on to relationships.
In addition, Kolsar also gives tips on how to find new people in your life: “I made a commitment to meet one new person every month. I’ll write or call them and invite them to lunch. Maybe we know each other, maybe we’ve met somewhere, maybe we absolutely don’t know each other.”. According to Kolsar, he has made many good friends in this way, and saying ‘no’ or not agreeing with someone should not be a fear. She says to get rid of the negative side of the ‘what if?’ idea and replace it with ‘what if I get something awesome in return’.
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